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anger authentic self awakening awe beauty being body trust breakdown breakthrough but-not-through-me choosing coercion complexity consciousness courage create dance darkness deception defiance discernment discomfort existential fear featured featured excerpt fifth-generation-warfare force freedom free will funny grief hate helplessness higher self hope house of lies human fallibility hurt imagine intuition journey joy lessons libido dominandi lies love loving helplessly master liar mastery memory meta-truth mind control monolith multiplicity music mystery my writing no control non-violence not-knowing on-towards personal responsibility play psychodrama purpose repetition resonance science secret-self secret-you self self loving self shame slavery struggle surrender symbol-666 symbols terrible becoming terror the adversary the dao the feather the method the shadow totality transcendicant transform trauma trust truth truth-tears tyranny uncertainty violence warrior of light words wordwar3 wrongness